The more words a child hears in the first three years of life, the more successfully he develops in the future. So, should he play more podcasts about business and science? It is not that simple. The pediatrician tells how to create optimal conditions for communication.
A real discovery of the turn of the century was a study by developmental psychologists from the University of Kansas (USA) Betty Hart and Todd Risley that predetermine a person’s achievements not by innate abilities, not by the economic situation of the family, not by race and not by gender, but by the number of words with which they are addressed surrounding in the first years of life1.
It is useless to sit a child in front of a TV or turn on an audiobook for several hours: communication with an adult is of fundamental importance.
Of course, saying «stop» thirty million times will not help a child grow into a smart, productive, and emotionally stable adult. It is important that this communication is meaningful, and that speech is complex and varied.
Without interaction with others, the ability to learn weakens. “Unlike a jug that will store whatever you pour into it, the brain without feedback is more like a sieve,” notes Dana Suskind. “Language cannot be learned passively, but only through the response (preferably positive) reaction of others and social interaction.”
Dr. Suskind summarized the latest research in the field of early development and developed a parent-child communication program that will contribute to the best development of the child’s brain. Her strategy consists of three principles: tune in to the child, communicate with him more often, develop a dialogue.
Customization for a child
We are talking about the conscious desire of the parent to notice everything that interests the baby and talk to him about this topic. In other words, you need to look in the same direction as the child.
Pay attention to his work. For example, a well-intentioned adult sits on the floor with a child’s favorite book and invites him to listen. But the child does not react, continuing to build a tower of blocks scattered on the floor. Parents call again: “Come here, sit down. Look what an interesting book. Now I’m reading to you.»
Everything seems to be fine, right? Loving adult book. What else does a child need? Perhaps only one thing: the attention of parents to the occupation in which the child himself is currently interested.
To tune in to a child means to be attentive to what he is doing and to join in his activities. This strengthens the contact and helps to improve the skills involved in the game, and through verbal interaction, to develop his brain.
The child can only focus on what interests him
The fact is that the child can only focus on what interests him. If you try to switch his attention to another activity, the brain has to expend a lot of extra energy.
In particular, studies have shown that if a child has to participate in an activity that interests him little, he is unlikely to remember the words used at that time.2.
Be on the same level as your child. Sit on the floor with him while playing, hold him on your lap while reading, sit at the same table while eating, or lift your baby up so that he looks at the world from the height of your height.
Simplify your speech. Just as babies attract attention with sounds, so parents lure them in by changing the tone or volume of their voice. Lisping also helps children’s brains learn language.
A recent study found that two-year-olds who were lisped to between the ages of 11 and 14 months knew twice as many words as those who were spoken to «in an adult way.»
Simple, recognizable words quickly draw the child’s attention to what is being said and who is speaking, encouraging him to strain his attention, get involved and communicate. It has been experimentally proven that children “learn” the words they hear more often and listen longer to the sounds they heard before.
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Say out loud everything you do. Such commenting is another way to «surround» the child with speech.. It not only increases vocabulary, but also shows the relationship between the sound (word) and the action or thing to which it refers.
“Let’s put on a new diaper…. It is white on the outside and blue on the inside. And not wet. Look. Dry and so soft.» «Get some toothbrushes! Yours is purple and daddy’s is green. Now squeeze out the paste, press a little. And we will clean, up and down. Ticklish?
Use passing comments. Try not only to describe your activities, but also comment on the actions of the child: “Oh, you found your mother’s keys. Please don’t put them in your mouth. They cannot be chewed. This is not food. Do you open your car with keys? The keys open the door. Let’s open the door with them.»
Avoid Pronouns: You Can’t See Them
Avoid pronouns. Pronouns cannot be seen, unless imagined, and then if you know what it is about. He… she… it? The child has no idea what you are talking about. Not «I like it», but «I like your drawing».
Supplement, detail his phrases. When learning a language, a child uses parts of words and incomplete sentences. In the context of communication with the baby, it is necessary to fill in such gaps by repeating already completed phrases. The addition to: «The dog is sad» will be: «Your dog is sad.»
Over time, the complexity of speech increases. Instead of: “Come on, let’s say,” we say: “Your eyes are already sticking together. It’s very late and you’re tired.» Additions, detailing and building phrases allow you to be a couple of steps ahead of your baby’s communication skills, encouraging him to more complex and versatile communication.
Dialogue Development
Dialogue involves the exchange of remarks. This is the golden rule of communication between parents and children, the most valuable of the three methods for developing a young brain. You can achieve active interaction by tuning in to what occupies the attention of the baby, and talking with him about it as much as possible.
Wait patiently for a response. In dialogue, it is very important to adhere to the alternation of roles. Complementing facial expressions and gestures with words — first supposed, then imitated and, finally, real, the child can pick them up for a very long time.
So long that mom or dad wants to answer for it. But do not rush to break the dialogue, give the child time to find the right word.
The words “what” and “what” prevent dialogue. «What color is the ball?» «What does the cow say?» Such questions do not contribute to the accumulation of vocabulary, because they encourage the child to recall words that he already knows.
Yes or no questions fall into the same category: they don’t help keep the conversation going and they don’t teach you anything new. On the contrary, questions like “how” or “why” allow him to answer with a variety of words, involve a variety of thoughts and ideas.
To the question «why» it is impossible to nod your head or point a finger. «How?» and why?» start the process of thinking, which ultimately leads to the skill of problem solving.
1 A. Weisleder, A. Fernald «Talking to children matters: Early language experience strengthens processing and builds vocabulary». Psychological Science, 2013, № 24.
2 G. Hollich, K. Hirsh-Pasek, and R. M. Golinkoff «Breaking the language barrier: An emergentist coalition model for the origins of word learning», Monographs of the Society for Research in Child Development 65.3, № 262 (2000).