In each of us there are sides that we do not see, do not accept. They contain energy that can be released. But what if we are ashamed and afraid to look deep into ourselves, into our Shadow? We talked about this with psychologist Gleb Lozinsky.
The name of the practice «Shadow Work» evokes associations with the Jungian archetype, but also with martial arts that include the «shadow boxing» exercise. What does she represent? Let’s start with the most important…
Psychologies: What is this Shadow?
Gleb Lozinsky: Jung called the shadow an archetype, which in the psyche absorbs everything that we do not recognize in ourselves, who we do not want to be. We do not see, we do not hear, we do not feel, we do not fully or partially perceive. In other words, the Shadow is what is in us, but what we consider not to be ourselves, a rejected identity. For example: I will not allow aggression or, on the contrary, weakness, because I think that this is bad. Or I won’t defend what’s mine because I think possessiveness is unworthy. We may also not recognize that we are kind, generous, and so on. And this too is the rejected Shadow.
And you can’t see it…
It is difficult for any of us to grasp a shadow, how to bite an elbow, how to see two sides of the Moon at once with the eye. But it can be recognized by indirect signs. Here we make a decision: everything, I will never be angry again! And yet, “Oops! Where is the equanimity!?”, “But how is it, I didn’t want to!”. Or someone says something like “I love you”, and there is disdain or arrogance in the voice, the words do not agree with the intonation. Or someone will be told: you are such a stubborn, arguing, and he soars indignantly that no, I am not like that, there is no evidence!
Look around: there are plenty of examples. We easily see someone else’s Shadow (straw in the eye), but we cannot see our own (log). And one more thing: when something in others is excessive, it is excessive, irritates or admires excessively, this is the influence of our own Shadow, which we project, cast on others. And it doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad, it’s always about what we, humans, don’t recognize in ourselves. Thanks to non-recognition, the Shadow feeds on the energy of our life.
But why don’t we just recognize these qualities, if we already have them?
First, it’s embarrassing. Second, it’s scary. And thirdly, it’s unusual. If some kind of force lives in me, good or bad, it means that I need to handle this force somehow, do something with it. But it’s difficult, sometimes we don’t know how to handle it. So it’s easier to say, «Oh, this is complicated, I’d rather not deal with it.» It’s like, you know, it’s not easy for us with people who are very dark, but it’s also not easy with people who are very light. Just because it’s powerful. And we, so to speak, are rather weak in spirit, and we need determination in order to come into contact with strength, energy, and even with the unknown.
And those who are ready to get acquainted with this force come to you?
Yes, some are willing to go inside the unknown self. But everyone decides for himself about the degree of readiness. This is a free decision of the participants. After all, working with the Shadow has consequences: when you find out something about yourself that you didn’t know before, or maybe didn’t want to know, life inevitably changes in some way.
Who are your teachers?
My co-host Elena Goryagina and I were trained in person by John and Nicola Kirk from the UK and online by the American Cliff Barry, the creator of the Shadow Working training. John is energetic and direct, Nicola is subtle and deep, Cliff is a master of combinations of different methods. He brought into psychotherapeutic practice a sense of the sacred, ritual. But everyone who does this kind of work does it a little differently.
Care este esența metodei?
We create favorable conditions for recognizing the Shadow that most of all interferes with the life of a particular member of the group. And he or she finds his or her individual way to reveal the energy that the Shadow hides. That is, they go out into the circle and formulate a request, for example: “It is difficult for me to state what I want,” and with the help of the group they work with this request. This is a synthetic method, the main focus (in both senses) is to see the habitual way of behavior that distorts life, but is not realized. And then change it with the help of a specific action: the manifestation and / or receipt of strength, energy.
Something like shadow boxing?
I’m not an expert on this fight. If in the first approximation, in the «shadow boxing» the fighter comes into deeper contact with himself. There is no real rival, and self-perception begins to work in a different mode, a more complete self-awareness. Therefore, «shadow boxing» is used in preparation for a real fight.
We work with the Shadow so that the Shadow does not play with us. We play with the Shadow to work for us.
And yes, our work to master the Shadow initiates a deeper contact with ourselves. And since life and the inner world are diverse, we, in addition to the Shadow, use four more archetypes: the Monarch, the Warrior, the Magician, the Loving — and we offer to consider any story, problem, need from this point of view.
Cum se întâmplă acest lucru?
This is very individual, but to simplify: for example, a certain man may see that with women he uses the tactics of the Warrior. That is, it seeks to conquer, conquer, capture. Either he looks too cold in the energy of the Magician, or he is carried away by fleeting contacts, he flows through the relationship in the energy of the Lover. Or acts like a monarch in the role of a benefactor. And his complaint: “I don’t feel intimacy! ..”
Is it a long job?
Usually we do field trainings for 2-3 days. Group work is very powerful, so it can be short-term. But there is also a single client format, and techniques that can be used independently.
Are there any restrictions for participation?
We are careful to take those who need supportive therapy, whose task is not to make themselves worse. Our training is more for those who want to develop: working with the Shadow is suitable for personal growth.
What is the result of meeting the Shadow?
Our goal is to integrate the Shadow into the individual. The participant’s attention, accordingly, is directed to the place where he has a dead zone, in order to revive this zone, to connect it with the rest of the body. Imagine, we live and do not feel some part of the body, it is there, but we do not feel it, we do not use it. One part is easy to pay attention to, and the other is difficult. Here in the big toe is easy. And in the middle toe is already more difficult. And so I came there with my attention, felt it, but move? And gradually this part becomes really mine.
And if it’s not the middle toe, but a hand or a heart? Some people think that this is not necessary, because before they somehow lived without it, well, you can continue to live. Some people ask: I felt it, and now what to do with it? And our task as presenters is to make the participants understand that they have a separate work to do to incorporate new opportunities and knowledge into life.
If we integrate the Shadow, what will it give us?
Feeling of completeness. Wholeness always means more embodiment of me. Me in the system of family relations, me with my body, with my values, me with my business. Here I am. «I» wakes up and falls asleep. Mastering the Shadow gives us a greater sense of presence in our own lives. It gives you the courage to start something, that is, to decide to do something of your own. Allows me to find what I want. Or give up what you don’t want. Know your needs.
And for someone it will be the creation of their kingdom, the world. Creation. Love. Because if we do not notice the Shadow, it is as if we do not notice the right or left hand. But this is something significant: a hand, how does it move? Oh, look, she reached out there, stroked someone, created something, pointed somewhere.
When we notice this, another life begins with a new «I». But working with the Shadow, with the unconscious in us, is an endless process, because only God is one and omnipresent, and a person is always limited in self-perception, world perception. As long as we are not the sun, we will have a Shadow, we will not get away from this. And we always have something to discover and transform in ourselves. We work with the Shadow so that the Shadow does not play with us. We play with the Shadow so that the Shadow will work for us.